How was your high school? Or just school in general, college is ok too

[Sun.]

I'm not going to say much 

Spoiler

I can't wait until I can leave school and go to Uni (2 years left) 

I've been feeling a lot more negative emotions in my life these past few months, the sheer number of ways life can make you feel shitty is unfathomable.

Schoolwork, Normal work and other IRL stuff is starting to mess with me 

Good news is

It always gets better eventually

Edited September 12, 2024 by Jamqx
Added Spoiler

[Space Banana]

I graduated from college this year. College has good and bad things, and your experience varies a lot depending on your course, institution and country. High school was way worse, honestly.

 

High school was a hellscape to me. You can't get anything in high school to matter because in my country it's all a race to milk the grades as much as possible so you can have a remote opportunity to enter the college course you want. The evaluation methods are based on memory and repetition rather than understanding and creating, and I always stressed with the little time we have for tests. The memory-based evaluation approach does not accurately evaluate your competence in a certain field, but it seems that it helps "normal" people get higher grades (so much that now the grades of all HS in my country are inflated, making entering college even harder and more inaccurate). All of this is done while you are a teenager full of hormones in a class of many other teenagers full of hormones.

Due to the memory-based evaluation approach, high school can crush some of your interests completely. I like maths, I like algorithms and functions and developing logical solutions, and yet my maths grades dropped to negative in 12th grade!!! Math is all about logic, understanding, solving problems, but in the end of 11th grade and the whole 12th grade, all that mattered was memorizing formulas, memorizing exercises, memorizing specific things we did in class and I despise it.

 

As for college entry, while applying for a postgrad or masters is mostly curriculum-based (which is great), applying for the bachelor is not, instead it's based on all of your HS grades + national exams (you can imagine why physical education's grades influencing your entry on, let's say, an engineering degree is really stupid).

College itself was a much better experience, but I still felt that I was underwhelming and wasting my time. While you do many more theoretical works, research works and practical projects/exams rather than traditional written tests, you still feel like none of this matters, as you waste 3 hours (normal length of a single class) for something that could be done in maybe 1 hour. If you are self-taught in your special interest area or you like the idea of learning by yourself at home, you will find college very unnecessary, because you are wasting time, money and social energy on what could be done at home. So why do you go to college? Some fields require a more formal and organized education plan so you can be truly skilled at your craft (medicine for example), but not all fields require formal institutions to obtain competence and mastery (computer science, IT, software development, etc, my special interest), so you mostly attend college because you have to, because you need that diploma for opportunities or you need that networking for the internship after you finish your degree (which is not guaranteed, not all courses and institutions provide you an internship opportunity).

 

My parents told me that college was going to be where I find my true friends, my best friends for life, but as a shy/anxious introvert who is most likely autistic I'll tell you that I only talked to 1 classmate regularly, and our relationship wasn't that close given that we stopped interacting when we graduated. Other people formed friend circles either because they already knew each other or they somehow telepathically communicated with each other and automatically became good friends. Most of my classmates didn't really develop any chemistry with me or an interest in being my friends, because we were too different I guess. Not only that but I developed a handful of enemies. Most of these people were overly political arrogant, condescending people that didn't like my presence or despised me for not having the same political beliefs as them (college is known for its very political environment in fields of art, media, literature, philosophy, etc etc).

I suggest you pursue what you truly like in college, because otherwise you won't have the patience or energy to invest effort into your work and study. It's not worth it to risk studying at a field you don't like and then be sad that this is your job, or not even be able to find a job.

 

Despite my hardcore interest being computer science and IT, I actually graduated in audiovisual, because I had in mind that for a professional context this field would be more fun, since I also like doing digital art. Not only that but a 16/20 HS average grade wouldn't be enough for me to enter computer engineering due to the HS grade inflation problem, and none of my software projects and skills/knowledge matter for getting into the course because applying for a bachelor isn't curriculum-based!!!!!!!!!! Despite my graduation, I want to work in software development, cybersecurity or system administration, nothing related to audiovisual, but I find it hard to get a job from just sending CVs. In today's world it's very hard to get employed unless you have connections. Networking is all that matters, but a shut-in introvert like me has no networking. I did apply for a cybersecurity postgrad and I believe I have very good odds of entering it, but until then I'll stay a NEET, and if I don't get a job opportunity while studying then I'll take the internship opportunity you get at the end of the postgrad.

Edited September 12, 2024 by Space Banana

[スカーレット大鎌]

study fine for me bc i need that but the student no
why i say the student well since i was elementary i somehow became an easy target firstly i not really sure what even my problem am i ever end up in fight (the worst case) no then why me....well after done there it happens again still strange to me so many year i try to atleast hide my other self, for all those year that gone i've made up few friend but i realized one thing that i can't trust them, why? bc how they treat me like i'm far below them but our age was even close so why bother with that in the end i notice that i can easily count how much friend i have which i mean friend is not like what i explain before since traitor is worse beside someone who show their dislike toward you

[Idioms21]

High school has been very all over the place, its where I've had my worst times and best times, but I guess that is to be expected considering how much years we have to spend there. But right now I'm just grateful I finally got out this year and now I'm free to make my own choices in life. But anyways here's the rest of the story.
 

Spoiler

Around the start was the worst since I'm the weird quiet kid at the back and it really didn't do me any favors in a place where you gotta have people to get your back. But later on I did get into a friend group and we simply had that chemistry between all of us, we were doing many school activity and projects together in and outside of school grounds. We also had a friendly competition and were trying to get top of the class (it's kind of big deal in asian schools) and it's the only time in my life I ever cared about that, and seeing my grade went from dogshit to impressive just because I have other people giving me reasons to do better for myself was great. I've heard of the phrase "peaking in high school" but never understood how it could even happen, but now I get it since this is pretty much the peak of my life, I have friends, I'm showing great results, I don't feel lonely and left out, etc.

But then pandemic hits and class was abruptly put to and end. I still vividly remember that night when we last saw each other. 7p.m. class just ended and we would walk together til we reach the place where we all would part ways, we exchange goodbyes and remind each other we'd meetup on the weekends to play League at the internet cafe... But that never happened due the lockdown, in fact we never got to see each other until 3 years later.

The next 2 years of school while there is the pandemic is just shit and boring and im not gonna get into it.

Once the pandemic ended I moved to a different city to go to a different high school and it was strange moving to a place with a vastly different culture, vibes, and lingo from your old one, but everyone was so nice to me and showed me around the school and parts of the city I didn't know about. It felt like I belonged there really, and I didn't expect to make new friends that fast. But reasons reasons and more reasons... I had to go back to my home city to a different high school and be the transfer student and now I really enter the worst parts.

Moving to a place where there are already established friend groups while being the quiet shy one was the worst, like no one payed me any attention at all. The next year was pretty much the same since my classmates were the same people and thus no opportunity to make new friends since no one for some reason wants more people in their established friend groups (like, Jake, can we not be after school buddies? we both like the same animes, Samantha, can we atleast talk about the newest episode of Jujustsu Kaisen?!). I also got assigned as a leader of the research group of a bunch of dudes no one wants and OH MY FUCKING GOD they made my last year of high school hell, they are the most incompetent nincompoops with no reading comprehension skills so I have to write the whole research paper (basically thesis lite edition) by myself from beginning to end and I've had so many sleepless nights cuz of this and I just bombed at every subjects and I couldn't even finish the report of the research so I got the bare minimum grade to pass so all my efforts just went down the shitter. This was my absolute low and I've even considered quitting and just start again next year but I kept telling myself that I have to bite the bullet so I'll be able to get out of this place. And it is all worth it since I managed to graduate this year and I just fucking bolted out of there once the graduation ceremony ended and didn't bother saying goodbye to anyone cuz fuck that place.

After that I applied for a college that only has construction engineering course that is also funded by the city government and is supposedly hard to get into but I managed to pass the entrance exam and interview despite not being a STEM student. But I got ultra sick at that time and couldn't enroll and they ran out of slots. The other place I signed up for was a technical vocational school by a heavy machinery corporation and passed but I never got a call, but considering how much workplace death that has been going on according to someone I know that is in there, yeah I'm rather grateful they didn't contact me.

Now that I got nowhere to go I decided to just fuck it and study computer system servicing at a nearby vocational school so that I can get a job sooner, and I'm currently still here studying. I'll probably get a job around the first quarter of next year if I can find the right recruiters that show up around the end of our course, if I'm lucky I can find one of those dudes that works for agencies that provides workers to foreign businesses and hopefully it's either Japan or Korea since its quite common apparently (my country's whole schtick is to send workers to foreign country and take home their earnings lol).

Life just has it's ups and downs so its best to just sway with the winds. Who knows how my life will be once I enter the work force, it could be fun, it could be not, but as an adult I'm now able to make decisions for myself and do what I think is right for me.

 

[ReisenFanatic17]

On 5/4/2024 at 9:13 PM, ReisenFanatic17 said:

it's pretty nice i guess

the only problem is my classmates cause they're absolute morons.

 

update!

it's getting worse

i barely have any friends (pretty normal actually)

also there's this guy who keeps stalking me in-between classes (for context i dumped him a year ago because he was really mean to me ;-;) (like bro it's over just let it go, plus you're ugly)

and almost everyone keeps saying the same annoying things over and over again (STFU NOBODY CARES ABOUT THICK OF IT!!!!!!!)

btw i'm actually considering doing it ifkwim

[Fairyfire]

On 11/21/2024 at 11:52 AM, Idioms21 said:

High school has been very all over the place, its where I've had my worst times and best times, but I guess that is to be expected considering how much years we have to spend there. But right now I'm just grateful I finally got out this year and now I'm free to make my own choices in life. But anyways here's the rest of the story.
 

  Reveal hidden contents

Around the start was the worst since I'm the weird quiet kid at the back and it really didn't do me any favors in a place where you gotta have people to get your back. But later on I did get into a friend group and we simply had that chemistry between all of us, we were doing many school activity and projects together in and outside of school grounds. We also had a friendly competition and were trying to get top of the class (it's kind of big deal in asian schools) and it's the only time in my life I ever cared about that, and seeing my grade went from dogshit to impressive just because I have other people giving me reasons to do better for myself was great. I've heard of the phrase "peaking in high school" but never understood how it could even happen, but now I get it since this is pretty much the peak of my life, I have friends, I'm showing great results, I don't feel lonely and left out, etc.

But then pandemic hits and class was abruptly put to and end. I still vividly remember that night when we last saw each other. 7p.m. class just ended and we would walk together til we reach the place where we all would part ways, we exchange goodbyes and remind each other we'd meetup on the weekends to play League at the internet cafe... But that never happened due the lockdown, in fact we never got to see each other until 3 years later.

The next 2 years of school while there is the pandemic is just shit and boring and im not gonna get into it.

Once the pandemic ended I moved to a different city to go to a different high school and it was strange moving to a place with a vastly different culture, vibes, and lingo from your old one, but everyone was so nice to me and showed me around the school and parts of the city I didn't know about. It felt like I belonged there really, and I didn't expect to make new friends that fast. But reasons reasons and more reasons... I had to go back to my home city to a different high school and be the transfer student and now I really enter the worst parts.

Moving to a place where there are already established friend groups while being the quiet shy one was the worst, like no one payed me any attention at all. The next year was pretty much the same since my classmates were the same people and thus no opportunity to make new friends since no one for some reason wants more people in their established friend groups (like, Jake, can we not be after school buddies? we both like the same animes, Samantha, can we atleast talk about the newest episode of Jujustsu Kaisen?!). I also got assigned as a leader of the research group of a bunch of dudes no one wants and OH MY FUCKING GOD they made my last year of high school hell, they are the most incompetent nincompoops with no reading comprehension skills so I have to write the whole research paper (basically thesis lite edition) by myself from beginning to end and I've had so many sleepless nights cuz of this and I just bombed at every subjects and I couldn't even finish the report of the research so I got the bare minimum grade to pass so all my efforts just went down the shitter. This was my absolute low and I've even considered quitting and just start again next year but I kept telling myself that I have to bite the bullet so I'll be able to get out of this place. And it is all worth it since I managed to graduate this year and I just fucking bolted out of there once the graduation ceremony ended and didn't bother saying goodbye to anyone cuz fuck that place.

After that I applied for a college that only has construction engineering course that is also funded by the city government and is supposedly hard to get into but I managed to pass the entrance exam and interview despite not being a STEM student. But I got ultra sick at that time and couldn't enroll and they ran out of slots. The other place I signed up for was a technical vocational school by a heavy machinery corporation and passed but I never got a call, but considering how much workplace death that has been going on according to someone I know that is in there, yeah I'm rather grateful they didn't contact me.

Now that I got nowhere to go I decided to just fuck it and study computer system servicing at a nearby vocational school so that I can get a job sooner, and I'm currently still here studying. I'll probably get a job around the first quarter of next year if I can find the right recruiters that show up around the end of our course, if I'm lucky I can find one of those dudes that works for agencies that provides workers to foreign businesses and hopefully it's either Japan or Korea since its quite common apparently (my country's whole schtick is to send workers to foreign country and take home their earnings lol).

Life just has it's ups and downs so its best to just sway with the winds. Who knows how my life will be once I enter the work force, it could be fun, it could be not, but as an adult I'm now able to make decisions for myself and do what I think is right for me.

 

Interesting that expiring to be an expat is the norm over there.

[Fairyfire]

On 11/24/2024 at 12:57 PM, ReisenFanatic17 said:

update!

it's getting worse

i barely have any friends (pretty normal actually)

also there's this guy who keeps stalking me in-between classes (for context i dumped him a year ago because he was really mean to me ;-;) (like bro it's over just let it go, plus you're ugly)

and almost everyone keeps saying the same annoying things over and over again (STFU NOBODY CARES ABOUT THICK OF IT!!!!!!!)

btw i'm actually considering doing it ifkwim

Having friends is a game of roulette when you're a weirdo, especially if you weren't born and raised with the same people all your life.

some dudes have a real hard time letting go, especially in their earlier years.